Aborting The Abortion Debate

A ruthless critique of BOTH of America's political parties.

DISCLAIMER: This analysis of America’s abortion debate may not be suitable for readers with strong feelings on the subject of abortion.

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Do you sometimes grow weary of America’s never ending abortion debate? I know I do. It’s not that babies and freedom aren’t important, for of course they are. It’s just that so often the abortion debate seems to contain so much more heat than it does light.

It’s almost as if the hysterical demonstrations on BOTH sides of the abortion debate have become a new form of sex, where everyone is having moral superiority orgasms in public. It’s embarrassing. Get a room you guys…

In America’s current hyper partisan political environment it’s typically assumed that when it comes to abortion, one party must be right and the other party must be wrong.

But there is another option we might consider. What if BOTH parties are wrong? What if BOTH parties are stupid on this subject? And what if I’m stupid for pointing that out, thereby alienating every reader on the Internet? Yep, there seems to be rather a lot of the stupid virus going around, so let’s make it worse by getting all wound up and mad together. I mean, are you MAD AS HELL?!!

Well, if you’re not, you might be soon…

The Democratic Party

I’m a pro-choice Democrat. So let’s kick our ass first.

What the Democratic Party really needs is our own version of Liz Cheney, a respected Democratic Party leader who will look their fellow Democrats in the eye, and speak truth to our stupidity, just like Cheney did with the Republicans.

I don’t mind telling you, I’m more than a little weary of leading Democrats always treating us like children by telling us what we want to hear. That’s not leadership. That’s divisive patronizing sucking up for profit.

On the subject of abortion, the game plan of the Democratic Party is to always blame the abortion controversy on somebody else. “It’s the Supreme Court!!” we’ll scream. And the Republican Party!! Trump!! State legislatures!! Tucker Carlson!! Those darned religious fanatics!!! The Democratic Party has a lot to say on the subject of abortion for sure, but here's one thing that you're never going to hear us say, the plain simple truth.

The Plain Simple Honest Truth….

…. that you’re not going to hear from the Democrats is….

Most (not all) abortions are a baby killing service that we provide to those who are too lazy to use contraception.

And that is the biggest threat to choice.

But wait, wait, my fellow Democrats will immediately whine, contraception doesn't always work!

Sigh... And so now we have to explain how sex works to high ranking Democratic Party officials with advanced degrees from elite Ivey League universities.

So you see kids, there is only one sex act which can lead to pregnancy. If you don't do that one sex act, nobody is going to get pregnant. It's pretty simple really.

The Democratic Party children will then blurt out, "Daddy, Daddy, WTF, are you saying that we can't have sex???"

Nobody said that.

What is being suggested is that if a person doesn't have full confidence in their contraception method they have the option of engaging in all the various sex acts with great enthusiasm all night long every day of the year, except the one single act that can lead to pregnancy. This method of birth control is totally free, universally available, and 100% effective.

The Democrat Party robots will now snort that this suggestion is totally unreasonable.

Oh, really? Unreasonable?

Are we Democrats aware that there are many millions of gay and lesbian folks all over the planet who never do the one sex act that can lead to pregnancy, and that none of them seem to be complaining about their sex lives? Are we Democrats prepared to tell our base that homosexuals are being unreasonable too?

For you see, we Democrats believe in human rights!! For ourselves. For unborn children, not so much. In the Democratic Party it’s always about our rights. Me, me, me and me, all about me.

Also, they apparently don’t teach arithmetic at elite Ivey League universities, because we Democrats seem to have quite a bit of difficulty understanding the difference between one body and two bodies.

You're very unlikely to ever hear any of the above mentioned by anyone in the Democratic Party, because to do so would be to undermine the Democrat's incurable passion for playing the victim, and pointing the finger of blame at anybody but ourselves.

The threat to choice? Somebody else’s fault. The babies we kill? Somebody else’s fault. When we lie to ourselves? Somebody else’s fault. When we lose elections? Somebody else’s fault.

This stupid article? Tucker Carlson’s fault!!!

In the Democratic Party, nothing it seems, is ever our fault.

How wonderfully convenient!

And where is the proof that our wonderfully convenient Democratic Party game plan doesn’t serve even our own interests? We’ve failed to persuade, lost the argument, and the Supreme Court has overturned Roe.

And why did that happen? In part, because we Democrats have been rationalizing baby killing for decades.

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Now What?

So, having read the above you may be thinking you don't really want to be a Democrat after all, so maybe you'd better be a Republican instead. Oops, sorry, no, that's the false “one or the other” narrative being sold by the partisan dividers. You don't want to be a Republican either, because they're just as delusional as we Democrats on the issue of abortion.

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The Republican Party

The Republican Party approach to abortion will make your head spin with it's mastery of irrational self contradictory thinking. To illustrate the Republican position on abortion, let's take a second for a quick little thought experiment.

Thought Experiment: If you will, imagine for a moment that I walk in to a state Child Protection Agency and say I'm thinking about killing my children. What will happen next?

1. Will that state agency use it's legal powers to force me to have more children?

2. Or, will that state agency use it's legal powers to take away the children I already have?

This is simple, right? Not if one is a Republican apparently. For you see, the Republican Party position on abortion is as follows:

1. If a couple is considering killing their unborn child, then...

2. The state should require that couple to become parents of that child.

So, in summary, people who want to kill their kids should have more kids, and the state should force them to do so.

After all, what could possibly go wrong when people who don't want a child so much that they are willing to kill it are forced to have that child anyway?

Also, please understand that the Republicans are strong advocates of limiting government powers, which is why they want the government involved in the most deeply personal life and death decisions a family will ever make.

And don’t forget, the Republicans are determined to demonize Planned Parenthood, the organization most responsible for teaching couples about contraception, the best method of avoiding unwanted pregnancy and abortion.

Finally, the Republicans claim to be protector's of the innocent unborn child, while they routinely attempt to cut the budgets of those federal agencies focused on lifting up innocent children.

So the Republican plan seems to be, force people to have kids they don’t want, cut the budgets for those kids after they are born, and if that plan goes wrong and the kids turn out bad when they grow up, incarcerate the broken kids to boost the profits of the prison industry.

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Now What??

If the abortion policies of both the Democrats and Republicans don't make any sense to you, here's your problem.

You're sane. You could be intelligent too. You might even be an adult.

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What’s The Solution To The Abortion Debate?

We’re unlikely to ever find THE SOLUTION to the abortion debate because we Americans like reckless sex and polarizing controversies filled with fantasy superiority more than we like compromise and solutions.

That said, having so rudely trashed everybody else’s point of view I feel some obligation to at least try to put some constructive ideas on the table, so that readers can yell at me too. Here we go…

Incentives

We could provide free contraception to anyone who requests it, much as we did with the covid vaccine. Nobody should be killing babies or having unwanted children because they can’t afford contraception. Luxury services enjoyed by the fortunate can be taxed a bit more to pay for this service.

This would also take away any “can’t afford contraception” excuse anyone might be considering using to rationalize abortions.

Disincentives

Making abortion illegal is stupid, because it makes no sense at all to force people to have children that they don’t want. On the other hand, it also makes no sense at all to have no barriers in place to discourage baby killing abortions that are a result of irresponsible behavior. A more intelligent middle ground might look something like this.

1. A first abortion should be a private matter with no government sanctions. We all can make mistakes and deserve a second chance.

2. A second abortion should require contraception classes in public.

3. A third abortion should involve more classes, and fines.

4. Additional abortions should become a matter of public record, because nobody should be routinely killing babies in private.

Political Corruption

To my limited knowledge, neither political party has suggested making contraception free. Nor have I heard either party propose a rational middle ground system of discouraging abortions. Ever wonder why that is?

One reason that we may not be hearing constructive middle ground compromise solutions from either political party could be that both parties feel they benefit from stoking the divisive abortion controversy. Both parties can use the abortion controversy to keep their base all fired up and motivated to donate and show up to vote.

It could be that most Americans are pretty reasonable about such things, but they’re being very poorly led by political leaders _on all sides_ who are stoking the flames of the abortion controversy in service to their own career interests.