Tanny Talk Blog

Come on baby light my fire

 

To invoke emotions that have been buried deep down inside is a crime. You have touched a chord in my heart which hadn’t been stirred for a while. Yet you managed to do away with the wall I had created around my heart and seemed to have left a mark!
It takes a lot of courage to keep one’s heart hidden away from the mother of all temptations – love! Words will fall short if I were to describe the hurt of love not reciprocated and will be an insult if we were to measure it. For the ones who know will tell you, if love cannot be measured, hurt cannot be either. I tore away from this world and believed that love is for the lucky, lucky are the ones whose love is accepted and rewarded!
The ability to love someone unconditionally is a gift and sometimes this gift becomes a curse. I had that too not so very long ago but today it’s a game long lost. I decided to keep away from it and a wise decision it was I thought, until of course I met you. You have invoked emotions which I thought, I will never again seek.
I assumed I don’t respond to it anymore, but since the time we have met equations seem to have changed. My heart now takes a somersault every time I see you. Your smile sends me soaring to the sky and I don’t want to get back to reality. Yet I know that reality is a far better option than the fairy tales. You have managed to get through to me so far and how much ever I want, I know you are not the one. And I am not about to fight and make wrong, the right.
That’s why I say, “Some people in life are like clouds passing by, don’t know why they come and why they say goodbye; their stories are never a part of ours yet the memories they leave are hard to let go!”

 

To invoke emotions that have been buried deep down inside is a crime. You have touched a chord in my heart which hadn’t been stirred for a while. Yet you managed to do away with the wall I had created around my heart and seemed to have left a mark!

 

It takes a lot of courage to keep one’s heart hidden away from the mother of all temptations – love! Words will fall short if I were to describe the hurt of love not reciprocated and will be an insult if we were to measure it. For the ones who know will tell you, if love cannot be measured, hurt cannot be either. I tore away from this world and believed that love is for the lucky, lucky are the ones whose love is accepted and rewarded!

 

The ability to love someone unconditionally is a gift and sometimes this gift becomes a curse. I had that too not so very long ago but today it’s a game long lost. I decided to keep away from it and a wise decision it was I thought, until of course I met you. You have invoked emotions which I thought, I will never again seek.

 

I assumed I don’t respond to it anymore, but since the time we have met equations seem to have changed. My heart now takes a somersault every time I see you. Your smile sends me soaring to the sky and I don’t want to get back to reality. Yet I know that reality is a far better option than the fairy tales. You have managed to get through to me so far and how much ever I want, I know you are not the one. And I am not about to fight and make wrong, the right.

 

That’s why I say, “Some people in life are like clouds passing by, don’t know why they come and why they say goodbye; their stories are never a part of ours yet the memories they leave are hard to let go!”

Tanny Talk Blog

Premonition

Prediction is very difficult, especially of the future! Said a wise man, once.

Nothing can be further from the truth; no one can really predict what the future beholds.

Until of course someone has a premonition about it which cannot be guaranteed and even if we do have a premonition whether we act according to it or just ignore to go about our way.

I wonder if any of the passengers and crew on board the Air France flight AF 447 had a premonition of their imminent death. Perhaps we will never know what exactly went wrong on board that flight which led to the ghastly crash causing the death of 228 people, not a single survivor left to tell the tale of horror! It is the worst civil aviation accident since 2001.

Did any of the passengers or anyone from the crew get the feeling that this will be their final flight? Well I bet most of them did not and they were more or less lured towards their final destination.

When boarding the Titanic on its maiden voyage little did the innocent passengers know what the future beholds. Titanic was the first of its kind in those days, all the latest technology available at that time were used to put such a master piece together. This gave an immense sense of security to all the passengers who had undertaken the debut trip in that fateful ship only to face their death. In this case though we did have a handful of survivors who could come back and tell the world about the final moments on board the majestic Titanic, which of course as we all know hit an iceberg and sank two hours and forty minutes later. It was one of the most deadly maritime disasters in history.

Did any of them have the premonition of what is going to happen? And if they did then did anyone avoid boarding the Titanic that morning?

Well! They did, people did have premonitions about the Titanic. It is alleged that the Titanic sailed with just 58% of its original passengers that morning.

The movie series, Final Destination revolves around premonition. It is actually this movie which drew my attention to the subject of premonition. Correct me if I am wrong, but as far as I remember the first part deals with a plane crash where a girl gets a premonition about the plane crashing and killing everyone on board. The second pat is about a road crash and the third part was about a ride in an amusement park. But the fact of the matter was premonition, people getting to know what will happen before they actually did.

It would be quite cool to possess the power of premonition. Being a psychic, knowing what is going to happen before it does. But does that really help? Can a psychic really save a number of lives? Can a psychic convince & convert even the hardcore cynics of the world? I’ve heard, though I haven’t been able to confirm, that some heads of state actually have some psychics in their employ! This is to help them govern their respective states/countries properly & get an idea of what is about to happen or not! Ridiculous as this may sound, I really wouldn’t mind having a psychic as my good friend! That way I’ll be more prepared for what’s coming my way!

P.S. I want to thank Sanch for this one especially!

Tanny Talk Blog

Catch the eye

We all know that women in India haven’t been given equal rights like men, they have always been subjugated. While we were growing up, my friends and I (I am sure lots of other women of our age too), had the hope that this inequality will go because we had parents who were open minded and who encouraged we girls in everything. We were hopeful that as we progress with education and are exposed to the western culture we will imbibe the good things from them and learn to give equal rights and status to the women of our country. The humiliation, abuse and atrocities that women are subjected to will be done away with and they will be respected by all men for what they are. But we all are yet to see that day.

Off late a lot of incidents have taken place which makes us think twice if we have progressed at all as a nation, especially in regards to the dignity of a woman.

I would like to mention the Mangalore incident first where innocent girls sitting and enjoying a drink at a pub in the afternoon were victimized by some hooligans who are self proclaimed protectors of Hinduism. They said that girls drinking alcohol isn’t in our culture, may I ask them in which law is it mentioned? Who gave them then rights to take the law in their hands? And last but not the least; don’t they have any BETTER WORK in life than go and meddle with affairs which don’t actually concern them at all?

The brutal rape and murder case of 15 year old British girl, Scarlett Keeling, in Goa shook the entire nation. Goa, the tourist destination and the party place for millions was rendered unsafe after this incident.

This incident was followed by a German mother claiming that a certain minister’s son in Goa had raped her minor daughter.

A few years back the rape and murder of a call centre employee by her cab driver had left everyone shocked and had raised the security question of women working in the nights.

When I open the newspaper daily in the morning I dread how many rape cases would be reported, not a single day passes by without us coming across at least about one rape case and only God knows how many goes unreported.

Its not only strangers or neighbours that Indian women should wary of; in fact the devils are sometimes even closer home. Just the other day I read a news article which stated that a girl murdered her father with the help of her brother because her father had been repeatedly raping her for the past 6 months.
This is not an isolated case, if you do a research you will get to read a lot of such incidents where a father would have committed such a heinous crime.

Another article had also reported a brother raping his physically challenged sister.

I know I have mostly stated rape cases here but there are other incidents also which challenge the dignity of a woman, whether it is eve teasing or a woman being groped at in the public.

I know of quite a few people who have had such scary experiences, no woman is exception to this nasty ‘rule of nature.’ I am pretty much sure that every woman or girl would have at some point of time faced such an ugly incident which would have made them hate the world and more importantly themselves, because whatever happens at the end of the day we women easily assume that we are the ones to be blamed for the untoward incident. This is so unfair, because the culprit would have done his deed leaving us, the innocent victims traumatized.

The psychological impact is so much that nowadays I rarely see myself or any of my friends moving around alone when it starts getting dark. I can only speak for myself and for the people I know, I just wonder in what safety conditions the rest of the women of our country are surviving.

I really doubt if things in this county will ever change, especially the attitude of certain men towards women. All I can do is hope!

Tanny Talk Blog

Sutradhar

Here is a peek at some of the most ‘important’ people of my office. This place wouldn’t be the same without them.

Baas – What would the girls do without him? And Ban’s life would be ‘uncomplicated’ if he were not to be there!

Dr. Marz – Without him we would not understand how an XRAY machine functions and Ban could have had a happier life without having to look at his ’special’ seating arrangement. This dude really knows how to make himself ‘unwelcomely’ comfortable especially when it comes to food!

FB – Thank god he is there in this office or else I wouldn’t know who the ‘most valued’ employee of Facebook is. Oh and thanks to him I came to know what I am exactly doing in my office – just uploading stories of course! Every time he sees Ban he serves her with one of his special smiles.

Opposite Girl – She is surely running out of boys now, leaving Ban scared that very soon she might start hitting on her too! We feel sad for her; she doesn’t know what she’s getting herself into.

Ban keep those tissues ready for her!

The Bee Man – I don’t have words to thank this guy…..he is the reason Ban is here. He is the perfect gentleman that you can ever come across…..perfect to the T….except when he opens his mouth and boom you get bowled over because ONLY doesn’t remain the same…..it becomes WONLY!

G – I first saw him though someone else’s eyes and then saw something else. Ban made me see him through my eyes and I shouted ‘He is gay!’ then Ban said ‘Look again’ and at that very moment he became another one of our ‘important’ peoples.

Transformer – He is still baffling Ban and I with his sexuality and hence he figures in this list and oh another reason if I may state, he will bowl over anyone with his command over English. Man we are just ‘baring’ with him.

Sammy Baby – He is our latest discovery and to be honest he inspired Ban and I to compile our list of ‘important’ people.

The first look of him and you will think he is a dude. He is tall, dark and handsome and then you notice him lighting his cigarette with a pink lighter while wearing skinny jeans. He is a classic example of being gay and well I am just not assuming that, the lethal clue of his sexual preference? He wanted to get his roommate to the office party! And he doesn’t even stare at girls!

So now you understand why we are feeling sad for the opposite girl?

Ban and I were just picturing this:

Sammy Baby and Transformer comes to know the truth about each other, there’s a lighting and red hearts start flying in the air and they run towards each other in perfect Ballywood style making the sequel to Dostana as Ban and I stand by the side and sing, ‘Maa ka ladla bigad gaya!’

Tanny Talk Blog

Article 377

If the pretty young things weren’t enough competition, now we have Section 377 repealed to add to our woes!

Now my gay friends having no closet to come out from are challenging us openly. No offence meant I love my gay friends they are a woman’s best friend after diamonds but to one his or her own. Fend for yourself.

The dry market coupled with the scrapping of Article 377 is a great threat for us aging single women.

Having said that I think it’s a milestone achieved for all the members of the gay community and the gay activists. For years now they have been raging a seemingly never ending battle which has now brought in results.

The homosexuals have always found hard acceptance in the society whether it’s in India or the world over. People have their own reservation about homosexuality prompting these people to be shy of their sexuality or sexual preference, especially in India.

The society in general has a typical mindset towards ‘gayism’ which is not very encouraging for the gays to come out clean. They lead a very heavily guarded life least their secret is revealed. They are under severe stress all the time thinking about their family, friends and work people.

A few days back TOI had published an article about a gay couple who were struggling to lead a normal life. The story was quite touching as to how this live in gay couple put up a pretence trying to maintain ‘normalcy’ in front of the world.

I read a book once, its called Almost Single by Advaita Kala, in this book also there is a mention of a gay couple trying to lead a normal life. Though the author has been a little more open about this fictitious couple, I still have my doubts about this one.

I have a few gay friends, most of them are open about their choice of partners but it’s only in front of their friends who have accepted them with an open mind, their parents are still unaware of the truth.

In my mind I want a society which accepts everyone freely and with an open mind regardless of their sexual preference and I am sure a lot of others do too. The annulment of Section 377 comes as a great encouragement towards this direction, after all everyone has the right to freedom and we live in a democracy.

So let us all look forward to a bias free society where everyone lives with their heads held high!

Tanny Talk Blog

RIP Meha

I couldn’t bid farewell to Meha………………..

Full of life…….compassionate towards animals….intelligent…..committed….strikingly beautiful and with a great style quotient….that’s how I remember MEHA!!!

I came to know about her sudden and shocking demise yesterday morning when I went online………..they have been flashing her face on TV since the previous night itself….but then I hardly watch TV.

Today I got on FB to go to her profile and pay my last tribute but guess what? Not only is her profile not there any more on my friend’s list but it is now non existent on the whole of FB! One can Google her name and it throws up all the articles related to her death right on your face, which is so depressing because there was more to the girl than what meets the eye now. Feels weird to use the word ‘was’ for Meha.

I remember the first time I met Meha, it was at a friend’s birthday party which was probably a year and half back, at first I thought Meha to be Neha, a lot of people make this mistake. Since then we have been in touch sometimes calling each other for parties or just catching up on life. Full of life she was I must say, compassionate towards animals. Even from the little that I know of her, her best friend was her dog and she was depressed after losing it. An intelligent girl who always wore a smile as I knew her, strikingly beautiful with a great style quotient.

She was working for Chilli Billi after her graduation but somewhere down the lane she wanted a change as she wasn’t finding it satisfying enough. As one night we sat chatting on FB, she told me that she was looking out for a change job wise that’s when I thought of offering her a position in my previous company as a content writer. She got interested and asked me about the details at length about the job, I explained things to her to the best of my ability and asked her to come in for a test. I also asked her to join us immediately if she gets through the test but Meha had promised something to her then employer and she had to be with them for a few more days till she completed her work. I discovered a Meha that day who honoured commitment.

She came in for the test one day, but the very next day I got a call back from her saying, “Taniya I don’t think I am cut out for this kind of a job you know. I like to move around and this job will require me to sit at the desk all the time.” That time I understood Meha was restless. I was fine with it as I needed someone who would be committed to the desk.

Then one day she informs me that she has joined a new luxury hotel in town and that’s where she wanted to be, I was very happy for her. Since then we got a little busy with our lives to be in constant touch with each other, she went on to work for the hospitality industry and I got into journalism. Time was hard pressed for the both of use but we used to keep bumping into each other in one of those odd parties. The last time I met her was at this party on 16th December and it was the same Meha. She came to borrow a cig from me but I didn’t have any, later I saw she had secured one for herself. She was a go getter, no denying to that fact.

I have still not been able to come to terms with her death. Not many were aware of the comfort level we shared, but she is one lady who will always stand out in my memories. We had an age difference of five years but the maturity she displayed was amazing. I really don’t know what went wrong that day what took her life away but the Meha I knew will always be the intelligent girl with a great attitude towards life, as I sit here today writing my last bit of tribute to her I know one thing for sure that this was not the way Meha would want to big farewell to the world!

RIP Meha, you will always be loved and remembered!

Tanny Talk Blog

The butt freeze

NO ACs WERE HARMED WHILE WRITING THIS NOTE

Okay this is for the handful of fans that I have and mind you they are spread all around the world! People from New Zealand, Canada and ummm yup even the United States of Amreeca inquire about what’s going on with my writing…..why haven’t I come up with any notes of late?

Hmmm there are quite a few reasons to it; firstly I have been crazy busy at work so haven’t been able to take time out and type out my thoughts ;) . Secondly these days my aversion to cooking has somehow changed to love and now I am addicted to my own cooking hence once I am home I cook, which basically leaves me with limited time to exercise my brains and fingers. Thirdly I have been writing and deleting my notes. I key something in and then get distracted. When I get back to it, my frame of mind doesn’t connect to it and many a thought was wasted in the process, man! Some were award winning, trust me!

Now today one of the most important members of the Single Women On The Go – Club mentioned something which was hard to let go of. I had to share this with you guys.

Since last evening I was a little stressed about this story which I had to submit and like always no one was willing to talk to me about it. Anyways, so somehow I managed to work something out and after submitting it I was having a chat with this important member of my clan. I said “Maybe I need to write a note to de-stress myself, any suggestions for the topic?” She said, “Ya, sitting in AC offices freezing one’s butt off!”

Tell me honestly how could I let go of this one? Sitting in our offices across the town, we single girls have one thing to bind us, other than the single status of course, the conditions under which we work and sometimes trust me it is worse than soaking up the sun and getting tanned, damn the freezing AC! “God I am really thankful to you that I don’t have to endure the sun and get more tanned than I already am!” But honestly people, on the other hand, this AC is really something else.

My neck almost freezes everyday because there is an outlet right above my head and as I sit typing on my system the AC eats into my neck and the spondalities doesn’t help at all but my condition couldn’t beat my single friend’s misery of the butt freeze! As she sits in her posh swanky cabin alone, her butt freezes because of the AC and if I may ask how does your butt freeze sweetie? Do you have an outlet under your chair? Oh don’t tell me you are sitting on top of the damn freezer! In that case you gotta find a solution to it babe, beats me how to unfreeze the butt.

Anyone out there got any solutions? Please holla back.

PS

Maybe this will help. I have pigeons knocking on my window from outside! When I open the window for some fresh, polluted (oxymoron!) air, the pigeons keep peeking in every 15 minutes to check on me! I don’t know which is worse, my boss walking into my cabin when I am chatting or pigeons keeping an eye on me!! Scary, creepy thought! – Courtesy important member of Singlehood clan.

Tanny Talk Blog

Single women on the go – Getting ready for the party

Ever been a part of the gang or the audience when single women decide to get ready together before heading out to a party? There are just two words to describe the situation, fun and chaos. If you haven’t been a part of it yet, make sure that you don’t miss out on one of the most entertaining episodes of your life. I have been an active participant of this chaos for a long time now. So it’s more or less a way of life for me, no wonder the thought didn’t strike me earlier to write about it until the other day.

It practically takes us women one whole day to zero down on the attire for an evening out. If that’s not enough, we also need to accessorize the look and do the make up which is one of the vital parts of the entire drama. Getting the make up done takes a long time even though most of us, especially me, would deny that. Though we select a particular outfit after much painstaking effort and great attention to detail, at the end just before stepping out of the house, we will find something wrong with it for sure.

First of all the energy is ultimate, if you were pre-decided on not joining the gang for the night out, the activities just before the gang heads out will surely convert your thinking. Especially if you have a mini bar in the room, it is an added bonus. Essentially each of them will be good at something or the other. One amongst the entire herd is for sure to be a good make up artist and another will be good at manning the bar and you will find one like me, the good for nothing types.

As one is applying make up, the other one is trying out everything from the wardrobe but nothing seems to satisfy her. The third one has a problem with her shoes, and thanks to her big sized feet, she never gets what she wants. The fourth one is all ready and set to go and is rushing the others. Missing pieces of clothes from the wardrobe are flying all around and landing in all odd places, the rooms seems to be in a mess, no one is bothered that the one with the shoe problem hasn’t found a solution yet. Suddenly she lets out a scream of frustration and the entire room comes to her help and voila! the problem is fixed in no time. Ok so now everyone seems to ready, well not yet, the bracelet in girl no.1’s hand seems to go with the outfit of girl no.4 so 1 insists that 4 wears it. Oh damn! Where is the perfume? Ok that’s done! Now just as everyone is about to step out, shoe girl has a problem again and is about to give up. Suddenly everyone else swings into action and fishes out just the right outfit to match the shoes.

Phew! They step out for an evening of fun and frolic. And men always wondered what took us so long?

Tanny Talk Blog

Lip Stitch

We were at grandma’s place and everyone was getting ready to attend the wedding of one of Ma’s many cousin’s. Ma was packing our bags; apparently we had to head out of town to be a part of the celebrations. The rest of the household was busy with their own preparations so no one really had the time to keep an eye on us, my sister and me. My sister was around I guess three years and seven months because I was two years old, even my nanny was busy doing something which I don’t remember. Yes I had a nanny who I thought was my mother till I was five years old. Anyways so as our playtime progressed a sudden brilliant idea hit my mind, an idea which changed my entire life.

We were in granny’s bed room which also housed a dressing table by the window. While playing without any anticipation I looked at the mirror and a thought crossed my mind. I suggested my sister that we should dance on the dressing table in front of the mirror; my sister didn’t want to try it so I being the brave one climbed the table and started dancing. Little did I know what fate had in store for me. No prizes for guessing the table gave way to the weight of a two year old and I came crashing down with the mirror.

My sister stood there in a state of shock watching me under pieces of glass and Ma came running to find me in a pool of blood. As the blood kept flowing Ma went berserk screaming and pretty much gathered the entire household. I don’t know who pulled me out of the shattered glass and pool of blood but when I was out Ma refused to look at me and ran out handing me over to her aunt. I was rushed to a small clinic first where the doctor nearly fainted seeing me bleed profusely. At this point I must add that we were in a small town and what it seems now was eons ago. When the doctor refused to treat me I was rushed to a hospital where I was given stitches and the marks of which are still my best friends. My life really did change that day.

Since that time I have stood out of the crowd. My cousins, relatives, friends and strangers have found me queer. At school people used to ask me, at social dos people used to scan me with questionable looks and I started getting used to and living with it. When I became a teenager and started getting conscious of my looks I asked at home if I could go for a corrective surgery but Baba said that I will be liked for what I am not for my looks so I gave up. When I turned a woman Ma suggested I should get it fixed but by that time I was already used to living my life with it, infact I told Ma that it’s actually my identity.

Its really surprising when I think to myself off late when new people meet me they don’t ask me anything about the stitches or marks. I am accepted with it, no queries no scanning, no queer feeling. Sometimes I do feel curious to know how I would look without those marks but they have been with me for the greater part of my life. I am proud of my LIP STITCHES! Reminds me of the naughty little me :)

Tanny Talk Blog

Random

Men can’t bear pain like women do.
My rule book says that there is no space for void; something always gets replaced by something else!
Now being well endowed can also fetch you discounts from the auto drivers, especially when travelling at night. No kidding.
One night at 11pm I tried hiring an auto, to quote his price he did not have to look at my face. He of course quoted an obscene amount, the look on his face clearly saying that I deserved to pay that much.
I am on my way to sue Victoria’s Secrets. I am against implants.
Just because I like you doesn’t mean you have to like me back, I can deal with it.
Aging is good, I recommend it to everyone. I find numbers sexy only if it implies age.
Women are priceless, treat each one carefully. Even the ‘bitchist’ one deserves to be treated with respect.
We have power, the biggest one no denying is the power to create life and also the power to destroy.
I lost my laptop at an internet parlour 2 years back.
Everyone should take to fitness. People say that it doesn’t matter what your weight is as long as you are fit I say weight control is an important aspect of fitness.
My ideal way to exercise is to swim.
Women love to talk about sports too and they have the knowledge to back it up. We might not be interested in every sport but we know that Michael Schumacher is racing for Mercedes now and a yellow card is used in soccer not IPL matches.
We are also interested in cars and think that SUVs are super sexy; looks are secondary when compared to power.
Someone had said, “I don’t mind if money can’t buy happiness. I don’t mind sitting in a Ferrari and crying.”
I have a sharp memory, eye sight and hearing. My brother says that I should have been working for CBI. Well their loss.
Women get stimulated by intelligent conversation and they can hold a conversation on politics, global warming and world trade. We are ready to learn about cigars too.

V.S. Achuthanandan is the chief minister of Kerela.
We like men who are in good shape, take care of themselves and smell good. Sometimes just your perfume will be able to do tricks you can’t even imagine.
Even we don’t like men swearing.
After what seems like ages someone told me I got the body of an athlete and boy wasn’t I happy!!!!! Sprinter, swimmer and hold a brown 3 in karate.

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